MRI? Day 68!!!
Sep 14, 2018
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QAvy4uUMbvc

[Music]
good morning guys welcome to Thursday so
we have errands to run so we decided to
take off earlier and do it knock
everything out of the park now so we
don't have to be out all day but it is
nasty I don't know if you guys can see
it was raining it's only 56 here which I
love it so I can I can deal with that I
can deal with that weather um anyways
and I decided to go ahead and bring a
beef jerky stick because my children
decided to eat all my oatmeal this
morning so moment didn't get to eat
breakfast so I'm eating breakfast on the
go and I'll probably stop and get me a
tea because I didn't bring me a drink
so anyways hope you guys are having a
wonderful start to your guyses day I did
get an update from April and she's just
letting everybody know that right now
they are okay but today is the day that
the storm is supposed to really hit the
Hurricanes supposed to hit her parents
have two votes but she said she doesn't
think either one of them have gas in
them and all the gas stations are closed
at this point is what I'm understanding
so she did go to the store yesterday and
I guess she said it was so bad there are
so many people in the store being so
mean there was one lady that was
screaming at everybody to get out of
their way or she's gonna punch him in
the face and April just said she is just
like shut up she's like I've literally
had it she tried to get her family to
evacuate out of there but their family
doesn't want to so she's staying put
with her family but I would just ask
everybody to keep her in your thoughts
and prayers along with everybody else
that is going to be affected by this
it sounds pretty nasty and I just hope
and pray that everybody's homes are safe
and lives are saved
you know materials can be you know on
four I mean they can be replaced it's
not easy but it can lives cannot be
replaced so I just hope and pray that
everybody stays safe hunkered down and
if any other people are close to that
storm please let me know so that I can
reach out to you guys and keep contact
April said that it might be a while
before she can really keep contact
because if they lose power of course and
she's not gonna have any way to connect
to Wi-Fi but anyways I just wanted to
give everybody a little slow update
about that and I will just keep you guys
updated as I get updated from her or
from any other people that are also
being affected by this hurricane
okey dokey you guys so I just got home a
few seconds ago we ended up taking my
tablet because when we signed up for our
phone plan we got a deal where we got
two tablets together and so when we got
them we had the I had really no reason
to like it came with the plan for free
so it was just like oh okay you know
whatever but I like never technical like
ever really used it so anyways anyways
so we got the tablets and I again I had
no role like
for it I you know I got it and I went
ahead in light by a play with it because
okay hold on just a minute because you
can uh you could access the internet so
it was nice you know I could let him you
know play with it in the car and stuff
like that but my lovely child decided to
take my SIM card out and let's just say
he broke the little compartment that SIM
card goes into and he threw my SIM card
away so we went today but when they were
trying to put the new SIM card in
because well they did it but they had to
tape my tablet shut I was like oh this
is great
this is just great so yeah that's what
we did and then we went to Costco really
quick and I have been craving watermelon
so along with a few other little odds
and ends I'm gonna pull you guys down to
my skin watch watch the making anyways
so we went to Costco and then came home
have anything else to do I'm Michael
what's the point in going and driving
around for nothing so
came home and Omar was like clearly
dying for watermelon himself okay just
cut this up this room I'll sleep in car
again so all he is sitting out there
with her so that she can get a good nap
in I hate waking her up when she falls
asleep in the car because then she's
clearly not getting an entire nap and
then she wants to try to take him out
but like 6 o'clock not gonna happen so I
would rather let her just stay in the
car and take over nap so he rolls the
windows down and he'll sit out there in
the Cardon like I said watch YouTube or
whatever Omar come here honey come here
here you go
say thank you mommy yes you may they're
doing so good with their planes
yes you may I can honestly say my kids
know what they're doing how are the
watermelons where you guys live are they
Arsen I mean honestly this year we
haven't actually how many I think this
is our second or maybe our third
watermelon of the season but last year
but this year so far they've been really
good and again I love getting my
watermelon from Costco it's
it's definitely my favorite place to get
one so we always get from Costco but we
have not had much of an issue really I
was gonna ask only if he liked when I
was taking a shower today if he's seen
like any discoloration because honestly
my bike so bad he's just like I really
don't think it's a good yeah I mean he's
like you know do some sit down exercises
but you know seriously you guys I
haven't gotten to do really anything I
mean I I mean I'm I'm still walking in
stores you know I'm clearly still
cleaning well it doesn't look like it
behind me right right now but I mean you
know I'm still cleaning the house up and
stuff like that you know I'm not just
sitting like so like complete
but definitely not moving enough and I'm
afraid what's gonna happen is my body is
gonna get used to it city like not
sitting pipe it's gonna get used to the
activity that I'm doing and it's not
gonna become a workout anymore so in
return I'm afraid that my body's not
gonna lose with what I've been doing
because it's not gonna be enough that's
my fear and so so I don't know i eating
wise I'm doing really good I have I mean
I really have been doing very good I
haven't done any like binging this week
I think my stress levels have calmed
down a lot just from last week with
everything going on with you know Maya
starting school and everything I think
all that has really calmed my nerves so
I know that in that direction I feel
like I am NOT like stress eating and all
that and I've been really eating very
cautious and stuff like that but I again
I'm just really afraid that my movement
isn't gonna be enough for what my boy
needs to continue to lose the amounts of
the pounds that I want to lose I don't
have a set amount that I need to lose a
week I just clearly want to lose every
week but you know where is that gonna
fall I don't know because I really don't
know what my body is going to react
against with not not moving moving not
moving enough and so
you guys have any suggestions or
sit-down workouts because I'm trying not
to put as much pressure on my knee until
I get in on the 20s with my doctor to
find out what he wants to do with it I
would greatly appreciate any
recommendations I know that all he said
you know I could just kind of just sit
and do like work out which I could and
I'm not I'm not opposed to that at all
um but again I just don't feel like you
know sit-down workouts are enough you
know I guess cuz I had in my mind and I
was gonna be doing the bike and you know
all this stuff and not doing the bike I
kind of feel like a failure in a way and
I know that's probably not fair of me to
do that to myself because you know I'm
clearly doing more than my boy that my
body has done in I have some movement as
I had hoped to do by now and so I'm just
a little bit bummed but I don't know
we'll see where this week goes how
that's what I was saying was that I did
do a Midway weigh-in to see where I was
at and uh yesterday and it said I was
down a pound but again again a pound is
not a lot when I have so much to lose
and that's where I'm just gonna him a
little bit aggravated
with myself then I just feel like at the
same time I can't I can't push myself to
the point of such pain you know it's
gonna do absolutely nothing so I don't
know I just try and keep losing you know
I mean I guess a couple pounds a week is
better than gaining up a couple pounds a
week and I should look at it that way
and I should be happy with myself no
matter what I couldn't even stand here
cut a watermelon if I wanted to because
my legs and my back would just really
truly want to give out so in that sense
it's like okay I you know I get it in
that way but I just gotta stop whining
sorry Bob I think today I did better
with my makeup keep looking at myself in
them view it's not as much today and I I
like that we got sagginess down here
let's go say something I did do
eyeshadow I did do what else I do I did
eyeshadow and eyeliner and lipstick
I sincerely hate
let's go sit down
that's I got mighty hopes sorry trying
to go and sit down have me some lunch
my life should consist of everyone ah
yeah I'm like well we'll just do
watermelon for lunch
it's blinding you guys out
I love these afternoons when I have one
sleeping one
that's a win that is a pure win okay
change of plans move into the room
because Omar is watching what is he
watching Peter Rabbit I think or
something like God good evening we've
made it to Thursday night
Oh today's been a good day I had a very
very good day I got a really good nap in
which is not wrong but it's just not not
a normal thing for me but I did get one
today and I am so grateful I just I
don't know lately I have been so sleepy
and I I don't know what has changed to
make me so sleepy but I just have been
so tired and I have been cold the last
couple days I kept my sweater on all day
today I couldn't take it off I was just
like I'm just too cold so I am nice and
warm now I threw on my hijab because I
made another video I'm so excited to get
that one edited but it is a crafting
video so keep your eyes open for all
right
and so I threw it on so that I can show
my face if I see on the video but yeah
and then I was just sitting here
watching news and watching hurricane
Florence as updates I'm just like so
I've heard I would get on here and talk
with you guys because that always makes
me feel better
um but anyways we really didn't do a
whole lot more other than what I had
checked in with you guys on
other than just taking the nap and just
relaxing and doing some me time I'm
gonna go through my clothes I because I
there's like everything mixed in with
every single drawer I've got pants with
shirts and shirts with shorts and how
annoying so I'm gonna go ahead and do
that probably this evening maybe I don't
know it just depends it sounds like it
might be starting to rain so not quite
sure how that's gonna go
it's been pretty nasty the last couple
of days but it's definitely been
something that we've needed because we
were so in drought just I mean we really
this summer really kicked our tails when
it came to no water definitely our our
area needed it so it's a very welcomed
sighting here but yeah other than that
it was just really kind of just a
chillax day it just kids played and we
watched Peter Rabbit I think for the
millionth time well actually I watched
you in the theater but I haven't watched
it since then so but oh my Omar is so
attached to the movie and it's a cute
movie so until I get tired of it then
I'm gonna mind it but yeah and what else
I think that was really it there wasn't
a whole lot going on today but I am
still really sleepy even from my nap so
I'm gonna definitely talk to my doctor
and just see if there's something maybe
my body is lacking I'm wondering if I'm
a little bit anemic because of my cycles
the last couple of months and if that's
running the course of why I'm so tired
but it's like
ridiculous how sleepy I am and so I just
want to talk to him and see what we can
do to fix this situation because I
really don't I don't like it so I'm
thinking I'm just gonna probably talk to
him when I go in on Thursday which
cannot come soon enough cuz I really
need to talk to him about my knee which
I'm pretty sure he's probably gonna be
like whoa we need to do an MRI and it's
like but as long as they don't have to
put me in the hole MRI tube I should be
okay but the last time I was in the
actual hole MRIs tube which I want to
say was when we got in our car accident
last June oh my god that thing was so
bad like I laid there she gave me you
know earplugs I was like oh I don't need
them she's like oh no honey you're good
so I was like oh okay
so he puts me in the tube and you have
to hold your arms you know down so you
don't touch the top of it so that's what
I did
and then you start hearing clink clink
clink clink up Jeremih answer here in
clink clink clink clink clink Lee and
you know you're starting to make a beat
out of it right because there just keeps
going back and forth back and forth back
forth and then like all of a sudden I
don't know what made me think about it
because I am normally like well I'm not
gonna say I'm not a like over like
paranoid person but I think I have been
more since I've had Omar but anyways all
of a sudden I got this urge that there's
gonna be like an earthquake was me stuck
inside this tube and I'm thinking oh my
god they've got to pull me out of this
tube my stomach is too big so I'm gonna
get stuck in this tube this is all going
on in my head right
taking this whole scenario out so I'm
gonna be stuck inside this tube and
there's gonna be no way out I got my
arms they're gonna get stuck and it's
gonna make me be stuck in this machine
the firefighters are gonna have to come
and use the jaws of life to get me out
no seriously this is all going on in my
head
finally I'm sitting there and I just I
couldn't take it anymore I hit the
button to like get me out of there she
comes on does the report thing or
whatever the speaker and it's like hi
Amy are you okay and I'm like now oh I
need out and she's like well we're
almost done like seriously like three
more minutes can you hang in there and
I'm thinking oh my god three more
minutes is gonna be a lifetime and it
really felt like a lifetime and I was
like yeah it's fine it's fine so I sat
there and huh my god about three minutes
I was like seriously like as soon as she
let me out like as soon as the bed
started to pull out I was like almost
jumping off the bed and I swore to
myself because of that feeling I was
like I swore that I would never go move
through an MRI again because that was
just awful
huh awful but I've heard that when they
have to do like MRIs of like your bottom
area that they don't have to actually
put your whole body and they can put you
in from legs in so I'm praying that
that's the case cuz if they tell me that
it's a full body MRI I won't do it I'll
live in pain before I could do that
again mmm or you knock me out put me to
sleep then I could do it so I don't know
how they're gonna do that
just yet but we'll figure it out but I
have a funny feeling that's what he's
gonna have telling me is that I have to
have an MRI done and I'm just like
because we've already done x-rays and
nothing showed really with an x-ray but
and I know that I didn't like pull
anything because the thing is is that I
well I can't say I didn't pull something
because there I remember when I was on
the bike I was
and I felt like kind of like a guess the
best way to describe it is almost like a
rubber band that's what it felt like and
then ever since then I have had nothing
but troubles now my left knee was giving
me a little bit of trouble there for a
while but that one has gotten that one's
totally fine hmm
but my right knee has just never gotten
completely better like it was doing
better for like two weeks and then all
of a sudden it just came back and now
it's just like oh my god
but it's really weird because the times
that it hurts is when I'm sitting like
right now I'm sitting crisscross on my
bed and it's throbbing if I'm sitting on
my recliner and I put my legs up it
throbs it hurts sometimes when I'm
standing on it but not as much as when
I'm off of it
so I don't know we'll see what the next
step is with them and if any where is
the word surgery that's completely out
of the picture I will not do surgery on
my knee at least not until I lose at
least 200 pounds because I am not in any
shape or form going to be stuck in a
wheelchair because I cannot use crutches
with this weight there's just no way and
I'm not gonna put myself in a position
of accidentally falling or something and
hurting myself really bad so then that
what's gonna lead me to have to be in a
wheelchair and I just I am not at a
position where I want to be humped down
like that like I just don't and that's
so weird now because before I really
started losing weight
I always thought of things to do to make
it an excuse where I couldn't get up oh
I can't because I got this wrong oh I
can't now it's like no Hank you're not
doing something to put me down no no no
no no not gonna happen so I would not
honestly I would I would definitely
continue with the pain until I lost a
good amount of weight where I would be
able to you know be a use a crutch
and still have some physical movement of
some sort because yeah wheelchairs and
me are just not mm-hmm yesterday we went
to Walmart and there was multiple
scooters available and I just walked
right past him I didn't even take a
second look at him I looked at it but I
looked at it and I told myself like it
was really weird I looked at it and I
was like you know that I when I seen it
yesterday it was like almost like a
flashback of like my just like there in
my past already I've already put those
in my past that I won't even accept to
sit in one anymore now again if it's
something where we've got a lot of
walking to do in a store and my knee is
acting up majorly then I will I'll
decide at that time but I it's not
something that I want to make like a for
sure thing like I'm not gonna continue
to put in my head oh every time I go to
the store I get to get in a scooter like
it just doesn't work like that anymore
not for me I'm too smart for that and
I'm too healthy for that and I want such
a better life for myself that the
scooters are not gonna get me there so
yeah and I'm thinking I've been really
thinking about starting to walk my
neighborhood at least once a day whether
it's raining or not I have a jacket and
my only concern is I do not have tennis
shoes
I have not purchased a pair of tennis
shoes in Oh as Finland
it's been a very long time because I
never needed to because I didn't walk
see there it goes oh oh I straighten my
knee out hurts so bad but Jeremiah can
you open up my door for Ezra please but
I haven't purchased any
and a long time because I haven't needed
to walk but now that I want to walk it's
like I'm gonna have to look into first
to seeing a pair of tennis shoes and my
feet have lost a lot of weight that's so
funny
I never realized that feet connection
lost weight but I'm gonna insert a
picture in here that actually is gonna
show you my feet you guys this was
before and you're going to probably want
to pass out the minute you see them that
is how my feet were before and that's
why I could not wear tennis shoes at
that time because there was just as well
put those away mama mama made you
something that that's why I just did not
ever have a chance to get shoes but now
that my feet have gone down in size and
I'm wanting to really start walking I am
walking in flip-flops is really not
gonna be safe but I really am really
deciding I think I really want to start
at least doing one morning walk a day
even if it's just one wrap around and
I'll take you guys along with me see you
guys can see you know the walk it's a
fair it's a fair distance especially for
me it is so I'm really excited I think
that it's gonna be something that is a
really good thing to start incorporating
into my daily routine and making that
time because I think that that's very
very important and even if it's raining
buckle it down and still do it yeah the
rains gonna be there whether or not
whether or not so if the walking is
what's gonna make me feel better then
I'm gonna do that and I was debating on
just putting some socks on some like
Hospital socks that I have and wearing
those and walking because they are
thicker but with it raining I don't
think that's probably gonna be a smart
move so
I'm not quite sure what we're gonna do
with the whole shoe department yet if
we're ready to buy me a pair of shoes
just yet or if I still want to wait on
that until I lose a little bit more but
I mean I got to find something to be
able to start walking and then again I
may have to just walk in my flip-flops
for a little while until something
becomes more comfortable or I can maybe
find some slippers which I have a pair
that I bought I think you guys seen him
from Walmart a couple weeks ago and
those might actually work just to walk
in so we'll see I don't know I'm just
playing around and figuring out what I
want to do but anywho that was my day
today and I am going to close because
I'm gonna go eat I am having a shrimp
salad tonight I am so excited so I am
gonna go and eat some dinner and spend a
little bit of time with the kids work
with Maya and has reading for a little
bit and then give kids baths and then
it's bedtime so I hope you guys had a
wonderful day today and I truly hope
that you guys enjoyed my video and I
will see you guys tomorrow
bright and shinies sweet dreams you guys
bye
[Music]
